While exploring what people seemingly think they are supposed to do in order to appear busy, attractive or likeable, I concluded that this all just seems like a giant façade. It’s getting in my way of getting to know people who I actually like.
http://elitedaily.com/dating/rules-dating-outdated/777713/
Getting in the way, indeed!
Hey y’all! As usual, I’ve been gone for quite some time. The writing bug has been a bitin’, but I’m not gonna lie; so has life. I’m sorry to have abandoned you as I’ve explored my corner of the globe and the people in it for the past few months, but also, I’m a little #sorrynotsorry.
What brought me back here was not a personal epiphany, or huge development in the world of poly, but an article posted by a friend on Facebook, with the quote posted above. I’ve agreed with the sentiment for a while now, and while the author doesn’t seem to ascribe to any form of polyamorous outlook, at least publicly, I enjoyed reading her views.
Regardless of whether you find yourself leaning more toward the monogamous, polyamorous, open, single, or any of infinite other possibilities within the realm of relationship statuses, I think that it’s worth your time to shun anything that gets in the way of getting to know the people you want to get to know. I think it’s a damn shame that some people think that there are “rules” to getting to know people, and who will stop getting to know someone they are otherwise interested in if they don’t follow these arbitrary rules.
Forget the rules; if you want to call someone the same day they gave you their number, who’s to say they won’t be excited to hear from you that same day? I’m only one voice of many, but if someone makes you that excited, perhaps you deserve to know if they are equally excited to hear from you. If they aren’t, perhaps it’s not a match. Who knows? Crazier stories exist than the couple that “recovered” from a same-day call back.
In the meantime, until you meet the person (or people) who make you feel that way, keep being you and loving you. When you’re busy living life the way you love living it, time flies by, and people see you for who you are and love you for who you are. Be you to the fullest; do it the best way you can. I’m cheering you on and doing the same.
Back to living the dream!
Hi there!
I’m Shannon, the author of this post and certified sex coach. If you’re looking for help navigating polyamory and other forms of nonmonogamy, check out my new website SexCoachShannon.com and see if coaching is right for you. Sessions are offered on a sliding scale to accommodate most budgets.
Love Times Infinity 
Professor Taboo
/ October 5, 2014Read the article as well. Made me laugh several times; good article. When in the early stages of ‘getting to know someone,’ there are several methods of learning what each consider to be “decent”….or outright fun. And even learning each other’s “decency” definitions — which can be quite different — can be a good match-barometer, right? Clearly some definitions of decency are mega-conservative, even hypocritical, i.e. contrary to human nature. But how does one determine those definitions unless you both test them and push them…..
….which I find to be exciting and adventurous! 🙂
And so I get many ‘rejections’. LOL!